HONOR YOUR MENTOR PROGRAM
Contest Entry Requirements
2011 Winning
Essay
2011 Honor Your
Mentor Essays
Make A
Donation in Honor of Your Mentor
Honor Your
Mentor Contribution Listings
The Group Psychotherapy Foundation officially launched the “Honor Your
Mentor” program in the fall of 2009 as a campaign of appreciation,
recognizing mentors and emphasizing their importance in fostering the
personal and professional development of group psychotherapists. It is
an opportunity for individuals to express their personal appreciation
for their mentors and the direct and indirect gifts they have given
them.
A highlight of the program is an essay contest in which entrants honor
the mentor of their choice. Each year, entries
are evaluated and the winner is chosen by the Foundation’s Scholarship
and Awards Committee.
Entry requirements are
as follows:
- The essay should
honor an individual who was significant in your life; perhaps a
grandparent, a professor, a colleague, a giant in the field, a
childhood friend, etc. (The definition is purposefully broad with
the key component being that they made a difference in your life.)
- The essay should
be no more than 300 words and highlight the significance of this
individual’s impact on you.
- The essay must
be submitted to the Group Psychotherapy Foundation electronically by
November 15, 2011 to
dfeirman@agpa.org.
- All entries will
be evaluated and the winner chosen by the Foundation’s Scholarship
and Awards Committee.
The
winner and their mentor, along with the all the other honored
mentor/mentee relationships,
are recognized at the GPF Luncheon during the AGPA Annual Meeting. The
winning essay is then published in the spring issue of the GPF
newsletter, Group Assets.
Additionally, all
the Honor Your Mentor essays for the contest year are published later on
the AGPA website for the appreciation of the membership as well as a
source of motivation for future contests.
This year’s inaugural GPF Honor Your Mentor initiative received
enthusiastic response from the AGPA membership. Prepare to be inspired
as you read the 2010 winning essay first and then the full collection of
this year’s heartwarming essays!
* **
The 2011 Winning
Essay
Francis
Kaklauskas in honor of Robert Unger
This book, Brilliant Sanity, is
dedicated to Bob Unger. Bob has been the major mentor in my personal and
professional life. If we look around this room, my guess is that many of
us have been deeply impacted by Bob’s wit, consistency, discipline, and
generous heart. He vividly set an exemplary model of behavior and
mentorship that I have thoroughly attempted to emulate.
In thinking about this dedication for a book
on Buddhism and psychotherapy, one might expect I would highlight Bob’s
ability to integrate western and eastern thought, or to say how he could
be likened to an enlightened divinity. For me, Bob has been something
much more, and something much more simple than a clever scholar or other
worldly guru. He has shown me how to be a good man, husband, father,
friend, and person. He has also shown me how to be a thoughtful and
dedicated clinician, one who has life balance, personal idiosyncratic
passions (i.e. singing, cycling), clear compassionate boundaries, a
sense of humor about himself, the mind, and human folly, and an
understanding that life is a blessing to be embraced and enjoyed. Bob
has all the skills and knowledge, limitations, and annoyances, of any
other great clinician, but he is a transcendent angel in at least two
areas.
Over his 40 years of clinical work and
training, he has uncovered every flavor, spice, and potency of human
aggression. Not only in the world and in his clients; but most
importantly for me, he helped me recognize, accept, and transmute these
feelings inside myself. Suicide, revenge, hatred, murderous feelings are
not obstacles, but tools once understood with depth and awareness. This
aggressive drive, passionate, seductive and destructive, he not only
knows, but has mastered. He is an emotional alchemist helping people
turn poisonous lead and mercury into life affirming gold.
The other quality I have observed in Bob is a
thorough dedication to understand and transcend narcissism in western
terms or ego in Buddhist language. Bob does not champion himself; he
champions everyone. He doesn’t take sides; he is on everyone’s side. He
can take the fall, the blame, the hatred, the wrath, so others can
continue to move forward on their path. His behavioral choices are in no
manner impulsive or self-motivated. He steps in front of oncoming
traffic to protect others, and releases these bruises in little bits of
rubber from his bike on the roads and mountains of Colorado.
Twenty years ago, when I was an ambitious
psychotherapist still in my twenties, I went to Bob’s office and asked
what I needed to do be a good therapist. He appropriately endlessly
explored this issue. He asked me why I would want to do this, asked my
views about this process, and validated my desire. Finally I wore him
down, and he told me what I should do: get into analytic therapy with a
well-trained therapist, get my doctorate, and have a child. His
recommendation of Dolores Welber, PhD, for therapy has been profoundly
life changing for me. My doctorate has helped me understand I am worthy
and have the requisite base knowledge, and starting my family gave me a
deeper understanding of human development than I could have ever learned
in any textbook, in addition to opening my heart more fully than I could
have ever imagined. By many accounts, this type of very specific
directive intervention may have been a therapeutic mistake. But I took
it and ran with it, and now today, I have accomplished these things. I
cannot say if I have become a good therapist, but more importantly, I
can say that this advice has led to a rich, engaged, and meaningful
life.
Right after my son, Levi, was born, my wife,
Elizabeth became very ill, and had to be hospitalized. I sat by her
bedside, an overwhelmed new father. Now, I don’t know if Bob and his
wife Helena had to cancel clients, groups, personal engagements, or
whatever, but they both came to see us, called everyday, and brought us
dinner once we came home. They showed me that psychology is not about
theories, ideas, and rigid boundaries, but about finding ways to help.
The many years of being a member in groups
lead by Bob and Helena not only taught me about myself, human nature,
the dharma, and the subtleties and power of clinical work, but more
importantly they inspired me to forever continue to walk along the long
path to emotional maturity.
I know you were doing your job, but I cannot
thank you enough.
* **
The 2011 Collection of Honor Your Mentor Essays
Nancy Kelly in
honor of Ellie Prosser
Broadway Dodged a
Bullet, Thanks to Ellie Prosser...
I’m delighted to have
the chance to remember someone who stepped into my life briefly, but had
an outsized impact on the path my life took thereafter. Dr. Eleanor
Prosser was a Professor of Dramaturgy and Theatre at Stanford University
when I started a doctoral program there in the early 80s. Having
discovered that I was not likely to make a living as an actor, I had
shrewdly decided to accept a fellowship from Stanford to study
dramaturgy for a few years, perhaps leading to a teaching position.
When I met Ellie, I was a twenty-two year old graduate student,
fuchsia-haired and homesick, having just moved to California from Texas
with whatever belongings I could haul in my old VW Beetle. She taught
the Research Methods class for the doctoral program, and she was the
first professor I had at Stanford.
While I loved her
course, and learned more than I’d even wanted to know about research,
what Dr. Prosser gave to me was something much less tangible. Having
discovered early in the program that I was not much interested in
dramaturgy (ouch, who knew?), I spilled my despair in her office one
day, crying and wondering if I could afford to pay for my gas back to
Texas. Unflappable as ever, Dr. Prosser simply pointed out that I
appeared much more interested in philosophy and aesthetic theory than in
dramaturgy, so why didn’t I reapply for a fellowship in the Modern
Philosophy program at Stanford? Knowing that attempting to leave the
Dramaturgy program would put me in a difficult position with the Chair
and faculty, Ellie offered to copy all of my records herself, including
my admissions file, letters of recommendation, etc. and to write a
letter supporting my readmission to the new department. And she did all
this, quietly, at great risk of political fallout to herself. In the
end, I was admitted to the new program with a full fellowship, and moved
to the other side of campus the next fall. Dr. Prosser retired from
Stanford within a few years, having done me an enormous favor at a time
when I felt alone and overwhelmed by the magnitude of what I did not yet
know about myself. Her kindness also ensured that I’d actually complete
a doctorate at Stanford some years later.
Though she died some
years ago, Ellie’s example continues to teach me a lifetime of lessons
about the profound impact of offering guidance to someone who feels lost
and overwhelmed. When I began teaching college students myself, I often
thought about how Ellie’s action helped me believe that I belonged in
academia—she believed in me enough to stick her neck out and help me
through the obstacles—and I often thought about paying this gift forward
to the young students I worked with who felt less than confident in
their abilities. She also taught me that changing courses is not a sign
of failure, but rather a sign of knowing oneself better. I’ve drawn on
this lesson over and over again, more times than I can count, as I’ve
changed careers and directions based on what I know today about myself.
I will always be profoundly indebted to Ellie Prosser, and I am
delighted to have the chance to remember her.
* * * * * * * * * *
*
Karen Travis in honor of
Her Parents, Otis Travis and Opal Williams Travis
Otis Travis, daddy, was born on October 28th 1903 and died
January 16th 1979. He was the 2nd child born and
the first son of many siblings to follow. My mother, Opal Williams
Travis, was born on October 4, 1915 and died October 5, 2000. I was
the last born of 5 living siblings and my father was 54 years old and my
mother 42. They had much experience in raising children, loosing
children to death and much life experience by the time I came along.
My parents were not formally educated but believed in education and knew
its value. In the early 1900’s living in a rural community and the son
of a share cropper, my father had to go to work and stopped school after
4th grade. My mother had an 8th grade education.
It is amazing to me all my parents accomplished and provided for my
siblings and I given their circumstances. I grew up on a dairy farm.
This way of life taught me many wonderful things.
So, how were my parents significant and made a difference in my life?
Living on a farm taught me about the cycle of life, beginnings,
middle and endings. Living and dying were a part of life, raising our
own food taught me about the seasons and living close to the source,
nothing went to waste so therefore they were ahead of their time in
terms of living green. I learned responsibility at an early age
and my parents modeled a strong work ethic. I took pride in my
age appropriate chores and felt it an honor as I progressed into
handling bigger jobs on the farm. They taught me time management.
I learned there was play time and work time… work on the farm, school
work and time with friends and family. They encouraged friendships and
being part of groups. I belonged to many groups: family,
school, clubs, close friends, church, and so on. My father never met a
stranger and my mother always had an open door and open heart. They
were extremely generous people and gave in many ways. If they were not
able to give in cash they gave in kind. I recall when my father was 74
years old (the year before he died) having retired and sold all modern
farm equipment and animals, decided to buy a mule, plow and all the
attachments. He wanted to experience making a garden the old fashion
way one more time. He was willing to take risk... It was a very
interesting summer for me while I was home from college. There was
ABUNDANCE that year. My parents gave vegetables and fruits away to
neighbors, family and friends. I have many stories of generosity.
My mother modeled values and norms, teaching how to move about
in the (group) world.
My parents had many wise sayings. Two of which stand out to me are:
Sweep around your own door step first and it is important to look beyond
6 inches of your nose. So in (group) therapy terms I might say: It is
important to look internally and to stretch beyond your
comfort zone. Much like farm life: it takes a lot to get a group
started, keep it running, making decisions of when and how to intervene,
stormy “weather” at times, what will be harvested is uncertain,
different seasons/stages occur and working together takes clear and open
communication.
I
appreciate this opportunity to reflect upon my parents and my life with
them. There is much more to say and I think this creates a good
summary. I feel a bit vulnerable in submitting this “essay” …. By
submitting this essay you are seeing a bit into my interior life and
that feels vulnerable. It is good to stretch beyond my comfort zone.
Submitted with love and affection for my parents.
* * * * * * * * * *
*
Xu Yong in honor of
Priscilla Kauff
My
mentor is Professor Priscilla Kauff. In 2006, she and Professor Anne
Alonso visited our hospital, Shanghai Mental Health Center, and provided
a one-week training of psychodynamic group psychotherapy for us. This is
the first time for me to know about group psychotherapy, and I was
immediately fascinated by it. After this training, the two
teachers actively encouraged me to try group psychotherapy, and
promised to offer supervisions for me via Email and Skype. Therefore I
started my first group, which is an experiential group composed of my
colleagues, and in May 2007, I started my first patient group. As
a beginner, I have experienced numerous difficulties and struggles, and
many times wanting to give up. However, Professor Priscilla Kauff and
Professor Anne Alonso, whose death was a great loss to us and made us
very sad, always gave me timely support, especially their understanding,
protection and encouragement for a beginner, so I can stick to my
commitment to group psychotherapy. My first psychodynamic patient
group has been going on more than 3 years, without Professor Priscilla
Kauff and Professor Anne Alonso’s help and support, I can not imagine I
could go so far. Their supervision help me improve my knowledge and
skills; More importantly, their understanding, support and encouragement
helped me to know more about my weaknesses and strength, helped me to be
able to tolerate more uncertainty and anxiety, and made me more
confident in myself and leading group. So, I want to express my
gratefulness to Professor Priscilla Kauff and Anne Alonso from the
bottom of my heart.
Please direct ALL inquiries and application materials to:
Group Psychotherapy Foundation, Inc.
25 East 21st Street, 6th Floor, New York, NY 10010
Telephone: 212-477-2677 Toll-Free: 877-668-AGPA (2472) Fax:
212-979-6627
Email:
dfeirman@agpa.org
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contribution to the Group Psychotherapy Foundation,
click here to complete a GPF
Contribution Form.
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